Sometimes tough for kids and parents: Starting kindergarten

Autumn time means kindergarten start for many kids. Three-year-old Mia excitedly tells everyone that she is now big and finally allowed to go to kindergarten. So every morning she gets up, gets ready together with her mom, and starts her day with a healthy breakfast. Then it can finally begin: Mia proudly grabs her little backpack, which she was allowed to choose herself. Her mom quickly packs a water bottle and lunchbox, and then off to kindergarten they go. Mia is bursting with joy. Unfortunately, the start of kindergarten does not always go so smoothly. Often children are afraid of the unknown or being alone and shy about new experiences. The adjustment to the new situation is not always easy for parents either.

With Mom’s and Dad’s support – the preparation

Ideally, kids look forward to starting kindergarten as much as Mia does. The excitement for the big day can already be encouraged beforehand. Often it helps to accompany a friend and her child to kindergarten in the morning. This increases the little one’s curiosity about the many great toys, the big and small kids, and the fun activities. Also, the child can already learn to interact with other children in play or crawling groups and is thus prepared for the time without parents. With books like “Connie Goes to Kindergarten” or audiobooks like “My First Day at Kindergarten”, the little one can also be well prepared for the start. To ease mom’s and dad’s fears about the big day, a detailed preliminary conversation with the future educators can help. It is also important to take time for the kindergarten start. Parents should expect an adjustment phase of about 4 weeks, depending on the child’s pace. The checklist for starting kindergarten:

• Indoor shoes
• Rubber boots and rainproof clothing
• Possibly items for oral hygiene
• Sportswear
• Water bottle, lunchbox, and own kindergarten cup
• Backpack

Important for every little nose: the adjustment phase

Every kindergarten is based on a model according to which newcomers are introduced. The Munich model by Winner & Erndt-Doll, for example, states that the child who has to manage the transition to kindergarten needs support. In the first week, mom and dad should each spend half a day with their little one at kindergarten. Parents are allowed to accompany their children and explore the kindergarten together with the educators and the other kids. The professionals try to learn about the interests and preferences of their newcomer.

Finally an explorer bunny? – The security phase

In the security phase, the parents gradually withdraw and the educators increasingly take on the role of the primary caregiver. The other children also play an important role here. Depending on the child’s pace, the first separation attempt is made on the sixth day. If the child handles this easily or can be quickly comforted in case of separation anxiety, the time apart from mom and dad is then extended.

The last step for every little one: the trust phase

With a clear announcement from mom or dad, the parents leave the room. The little one seems to agree with this decision if they then return to playing. Otherwise, the parents should spend more days together with their child at kindergarten until the child is comfortable with being “alone.” A final reflection talk with the educators gives parents insight into

• how the little one behaves in kindergarten
• whether the further adjustment has worked, and
• how the child’s situation is perceived today.

But parents don’t only learn from the educators whether the child has settled in well, but also from their little one. Through targeted questions, kids often reveal a lot about their new daily life. If the child greets mom and dad at pickup with “don’t want to go home yet” or “want to stay,” it is sure that they have settled in well at kindergarten. Image rights: ©Thinkstock / SerrNovik